Wednesday, November 15, 2017

14. chills up my spine | #30Layers30Days

There are many previously written poems
About lovers who aren't lonely, but still lovers alone
For years, self-love has been a process, steps taken day by day
Sometimes I felt close to being paired with the one, but never here to stay
As a woman who has found great comfort in solitude,
sometimes desires for companionship interrupts and changes my moods
where suddenly, I'm craving those long mid-day discussions
and those sweet and soft late night touches.
I vaguely remember  those kind and unexpected 'I love you' gestures,
or the simple forehead kisses to apologize after bad weather.
I miss the quality time with someone who was mine
and the mutual chemistry that gave me chills up my spine.

But I began to adapt the beautiful mystery in loving myself so completely,
that I'm only chasing after God and the dreams planted in my heart, never settling.
In due time, if true love waits for me
I will be blessed to honor my king.
If I am to be a queen, with no spouse as close to kin,
I'll just have to be eternally comfortable in my own skin.
The chemistry I experience will be in the small things I find
to be thankful for a life that was creatively designed.
On the days of stormy weather
I'll place my trust in God that things eventually get better.
There isn't pressure to find a love that exist in full inside of me,
because I am whole and I am free.

Chymere Anais | 11.06.17

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