Friday, February 10, 2017

10. fighting for love

After countless letters scripted, nights full of tears of hopeful longing, I finally gave up; because I no longer knew how to distinguish the blurry line between fighting for love and believing what is meat to be will be…and trusting that the universe is constantly working in perfect order. And not really knowing if love is supposed to be this confusing. If I’m being patient, what is it that I’m waiting for?

Perhaps, I didn't give up completely. Pieces of my heart are still fighting-fighting for hope, fighting to keep my faith in us alive, fighting on your behalf, fighting to function without you in the meantime, fighting to forget that people have free will, which has a tendency to destroy destiny’s map, but also a free will that you have chosen to not choose me. So again, I pose this question to myself, what am I even fighting for? Am I fighting for a chance? Am I fighting for reconciliation? Or am I fighting for to know the truth of if you would ever be able to love me again?

All I do know is, I miss the love of my life.
The love of my life is missing from me.

-c. 
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